We’ve now reached the end of week two in The Olympics, and it has so far been handed out 773 medals to 82 different countries. And with their 100 medals, USA has actually managed to win 13% of all the medals. No wonder they are on top.

Britain has tripled their medals and moved 6 places up the scoreboard since last week, but it’s still not enough to beat USA. At least they have ultimate gentleman Andy Murray, who should get a gold medal for fighting sexism. Also if you take into consideration that the population of Britain is 64 million, and the population of USA is 318 million, Britain is actually better, at least percentage-wise per citizen.

Australia on the other hand has moved down 6 places on the scoreboard, but in same fashion has more important things to show for. So what can one have worth more than Olympic medals? They have a savage commentator who calls himself Ozzy Man, and commenting rarely gets more glorious than this.

“If cats are known for always landing on their feet, the Irish are becoming known for always landing on their faces”